[it takes her a little bit to respond. granted, she's not in the best emotional state, having taken to either going off on her own or staring at the books nic left her with, after two very harrowing incidents.
but she sees that name, and she knows she has to say something.
even if it's partially a lie.]
FROM: akame@cdc.org
....i'm managing, tsuna. i can't say it's been an easy few days, but.....i'm managing. keeping myself busy.
i'm glad to know you're alright. is there...something wrong?
[sadly, it's what she's come to expect, considering.
what fresh hell now? is he in trouble? is someone else dead?
even worse, she won't even be surprised if the answer's yes.]
it's fine. i'm...not doing anything at the moment.
where are you?
[right now, she's tucked up in a tree, staring at the copy of Romeo & Juliet that she wasn't able to return.
but, she doesn't want to come off like she's been too depressed, even though she has been. so she'll take him up on his offer. she doesn't want to cause him worry, either.]
[she wants him to rest, so she'll take the initiative, and hop down from her tree. it only takes her about three minutes to spot tsuna's shock of brown hair amongst the rovers, and when she approaches him, her hair is pulled up into a ponytail, sword hanging in its scabbard at her hip, and while she's forcing a smile as she's clutching Romeo & Juliet in her one hand, her eyes look a little swollen.
she won't let him in on why she looks so splotchy; instead, she'll focus on him, and whatever he wishes to bring to her attention. she gives him a short nod in greeting, before speaking.]
Do you want to find somewhere private so we can talk?
[She's certain he needs the solace just as much as she does; in fact, during her treks of solitude, she's found another nice spot to give herself a breather.]
[ ah—! wait! she didn't even give him a chance to say no!!
but, she means well, and tsuna doesn't even have to move around much before akame finds him and he finds her.
she isn't the only one who has had more than their fair share. tsuna's done most of his crying during the last few days— today was a day of resolve. of choice. maybe he didn't have much of it— it was either an outcome that meant hell or hope, and of course— hope won, despite the various upsetting downsides.
she doesn't have to say a word about her appearance, and neither does he question it— tsuna was almost empathic in the sense of hyper intuition, and obvious tip ins helped deduce more than enough, where his heart gives a slight drop, his fingers fidgeting together and his expression sympathetic.
( She was . . . Crying. )
he looks weary if anything, maybe a bit restless, upset ( of course ), and something particularly new that graces both cheeks are scars— jagged, symmetrical scars, each about a little less the size of half an index finger, as if a single, thin blade pierced right through— at least she doesn't have to see what it was before ( two bloody looking gashes ). ]
[While her brow furrows as she gets a closer look at him, Akame doesn't make mention of his newfound scars. She has a feeling that, sometime during the interim----more than likely during either the neraki massacre or the Elder God battle----something significant must have befallen him. While it's clear Tsuna looks worn out, seems slightly jumpy in his movements, something is different about his overall presence, and it showed in how direct his message was.
She motions her head toward a dirt path leading east.]
Alright. This way---it's not too much of a long walk.
[As they walk, she remains alongside him, gripping a little onto her book. The path gets a bit steep and rocky as they head further out.]
Careful. There's a lot of rocks around.
[She'll quickly grab onto his arm should he trip or stumble; otherwise, she takes a deep breath, looking down at the ground for much of their trek.
God, how does she bring this up? It was clear during the cinnabug fiasco that Tsuna was familiar with Nic, and now that she learned that he's dead, she figures Tsuna has a right to know.
But she doesn't want to undermine whatever it is he wants to talk about. In about five minutes, they reach a cliff, overlooking the surrounding sprawling forest, as well as a river that runs through it, coiling its way through all the foliage.
Akame sits, dangling her legs and letting the wind brush against her face and hair for a moment, before looking at Tsuna again, forcing a small smile with strained, swollen eyes.]
Something on your mind, then? Your message sounded a bit urgent.
[ he walks over the rocks awkwardly, a slight stumble in his steps, but not terribly noticeable— he breathes a quiet thanks when her arm is there to steady him, able to offer a small smile, lips quick to straighten into thin lines once she looks away.
maybe tsuna was a few steps ahead of her— he knew nic was dead, who delivered the final blow, how . . . it was upsetting, of course— heart breaking, tearing at him at claiming tears of their own ( he cried terribly the moment the news was made known, especially how, but— ), at least with hibari, things were resolved. he wasn't going to dwell, not when . . .
— he had things to say first, though.
once they reach their spot, tsuna takes a moment to scan the horizon, expression thoughtful and threatening to grow distant. the wind blows, tickles his cheeks, whisks up his bangs— it's until she speaks, where his shoulders give a subtle jolt, pulling himself down to her side on the ground, crossing his legs. a small glance down at the cliff, akame's dangling legs— it almost brings a chill to his stomach, and for a split moment he has to look down at his hands.
his mittens are on. he keeps them on until he finds it necessary to take them off. here, on macha, you can never be too sure, and it wasn't going to be the humid temperatures that would put him off. ]
A bit. I just—
[ he inhales, a bit deep from the nose. here it goes— ]
[Akame'll briskly nod as she catches him, not quite meeting his eyes. That's something to consider---what if he does already know? Surely, he must have taken the news hard; even harder than Akame did (and she cried, too; cried herself to sleep more than once, cried in front of Hinata; cried in front of Kaneki). Tsuna seemed like someone who grew deeply attached to those he considered friends---something Akame understood, and related to wholeheartedly.
But how would he react if he knew that she was one of the last people to have seen Nicolas Brown alive?
How would he react if he knew that she tried to stop Nic from basically walking straight into his own death. and failed, with his collection of books as proof of that failure?
If he were to react angrily, she wouldn't blame him.
She should've tried harder, just as she should've with Peter.]
[But here they are, with a proverbial elephant in the equally proverbial room.
Akame takes a deep breath in the middle of trying to piece together what she was going to say and how she was going to say it, staring at the sky, only to blink a little and look over at Tsuna upon hearing his apology.
It doesn't . . . Feel like enough, though. I don't think it ever will—
[ apologies meant nothing if she were dead, after all. the same applies to vriska, and he shakes his head at his own words, brows furrowing and eyes downcast. sooner or later, he has to look up, back to akame.
he wants to let her know. he would try terribly hard to stand as a harder wall for those he loved, or he he'd only be a waste. a waste for his friends here and a waste for the fate of his home. ]
That time, when they attacked us at night.
[ the night raid, where he broke down and nearly left akame there to fight alone, run the risk of getting overthrown— ]
I put you in danger. You could have died because—
[ of what he felt, but he seems to be controlling himself before he says anything else. he does give a subtle gesture though, his hand going over his chest, stopping where his heart should be. ]
[Akame looks on at him, looking both somber and taken aback by how genuinely stricken Tsuna looks, hand hovering over his heart as if it hurts him to so much as talk about what had happened during the neraki ambush.
It's a familiar sight. This was how Tatsumi looked when Bulat was killed; guilt and sadness stinging him like the pinpricks of many, tiny needles.
This was herself, after she had to kill Martha; after all her friends in the Elite Seven died one by one; after she turned her back on Kurome, leaving her to an unfortunate fate.
She understands how Tsuna feels, but he can't wallow in his mistakes---and, really, he was a kindhearted boy who couldn't bring himself to hurt innocents.
He can't be faulted for that. Akame puts a hand on his shoulder.]
You were conflicted for good reason. That's not so much a fault as it is staying true to yourself. You can do more and be more, Tsuna. But here...you have to be willing to compromise your intentions with the deeds you have to commit here.
[Akame's brow furrows briefly. She understands what he's getting at: he wants to do more, to become stronger, more resolute.
But that will come with a sacrifice, as Kaneki reminded her. She herself had to cast aside whatever inherent righteousness that remained within her to take up the mantle of assassin.]
You have to be willing to do whatever it takes to protect those around you, and back where you're from, even if it goes against what you stand for.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
day 102
akame?
are you ok?
no subject
but she sees that name, and she knows she has to say something.
even if it's partially a lie.]
FROM: akame@cdc.org
....i'm managing, tsuna. i can't say it's been an easy few days, but.....i'm managing. keeping myself busy.
i'm glad to know you're alright. is there...something wrong?
[sadly, it's what she's come to expect, considering.
what fresh hell now? is he in trouble? is someone else dead?
even worse, she won't even be surprised if the answer's yes.]
no subject
FROM: sawada.tsunayoshi@cdc.org
i just wanted to talk to you soon?
if that's ok
if you aren't busy or
[ or want to be alone, just as he's done the last day. there's been too much to reflect and mourn to— ]
no subject
it's fine. i'm...not doing anything at the moment.
where are you?
[right now, she's tucked up in a tree, staring at the copy of Romeo & Juliet that she wasn't able to return.
but, she doesn't want to come off like she's been too depressed, even though she has been. so she'll take him up on his offer. she doesn't want to cause him worry, either.]
no subject
i'm near most of the rovers
are you around here?
[ he's been walking around for most of the day— left and right, so if he had to look for the right tree . . . he wouldn't mind that either—! ]
no subject
i am, so i'll find you. i'll be right there.
[she wants him to rest, so she'll take the initiative, and hop down from her tree. it only takes her about three minutes to spot tsuna's shock of brown hair amongst the rovers, and when she approaches him, her hair is pulled up into a ponytail, sword hanging in its scabbard at her hip, and while she's forcing a smile as she's clutching Romeo & Juliet in her one hand, her eyes look a little swollen.
she won't let him in on why she looks so splotchy; instead, she'll focus on him, and whatever he wishes to bring to her attention. she gives him a short nod in greeting, before speaking.]
Do you want to find somewhere private so we can talk?
[She's certain he needs the solace just as much as she does; in fact, during her treks of solitude, she's found another nice spot to give herself a breather.]
no subject
but, she means well, and tsuna doesn't even have to move around much before akame finds him and he finds her.
she isn't the only one who has had more than their fair share. tsuna's done most of his crying during the last few days— today was a day of resolve. of choice. maybe he didn't have much of it— it was either an outcome that meant hell or hope, and of course— hope won, despite the various upsetting downsides.
she doesn't have to say a word about her appearance, and neither does he question it— tsuna was almost empathic in the sense of hyper intuition, and obvious tip ins helped deduce more than enough, where his heart gives a slight drop, his fingers fidgeting together and his expression sympathetic.
( She was . . . Crying. )
he looks weary if anything, maybe a bit restless, upset ( of course ), and something particularly new that graces both cheeks are scars— jagged, symmetrical scars, each about a little less the size of half an index finger, as if a single, thin blade pierced right through— at least she doesn't have to see what it was before ( two bloody looking gashes ). ]
Ah— Yeah! That sounds better—
[ it would be better for both of them. ]
no subject
She motions her head toward a dirt path leading east.]
Alright. This way---it's not too much of a long walk.
[As they walk, she remains alongside him, gripping a little onto her book. The path gets a bit steep and rocky as they head further out.]
Careful. There's a lot of rocks around.
[She'll quickly grab onto his arm should he trip or stumble; otherwise, she takes a deep breath, looking down at the ground for much of their trek.
God, how does she bring this up? It was clear during the cinnabug fiasco that Tsuna was familiar with Nic, and now that she learned that he's dead, she figures Tsuna has a right to know.
But she doesn't want to undermine whatever it is he wants to talk about. In about five minutes, they reach a cliff, overlooking the surrounding sprawling forest, as well as a river that runs through it, coiling its way through all the foliage.
Akame sits, dangling her legs and letting the wind brush against her face and hair for a moment, before looking at Tsuna again, forcing a small smile with strained, swollen eyes.]
Something on your mind, then? Your message sounded a bit urgent.
no subject
[ he walks over the rocks awkwardly, a slight stumble in his steps, but not terribly noticeable— he breathes a quiet thanks when her arm is there to steady him, able to offer a small smile, lips quick to straighten into thin lines once she looks away.
maybe tsuna was a few steps ahead of her— he knew nic was dead, who delivered the final blow, how . . . it was upsetting, of course— heart breaking, tearing at him at claiming tears of their own ( he cried terribly the moment the news was made known, especially how, but— ), at least with hibari, things were resolved. he wasn't going to dwell, not when . . .
— he had things to say first, though.
once they reach their spot, tsuna takes a moment to scan the horizon, expression thoughtful and threatening to grow distant. the wind blows, tickles his cheeks, whisks up his bangs— it's until she speaks, where his shoulders give a subtle jolt, pulling himself down to her side on the ground, crossing his legs. a small glance down at the cliff, akame's dangling legs— it almost brings a chill to his stomach, and for a split moment he has to look down at his hands.
his mittens are on. he keeps them on until he finds it necessary to take them off. here, on macha, you can never be too sure, and it wasn't going to be the humid temperatures that would put him off. ]
A bit. I just—
[ he inhales, a bit deep from the nose. here it goes— ]
I have to apologize to you.
no subject
But how would he react if he knew that she was one of the last people to have seen Nicolas Brown alive?
How would he react if he knew that she tried to stop Nic from basically walking straight into his own death. and failed, with his collection of books as proof of that failure?
If he were to react angrily, she wouldn't blame him.
She should've tried harder, just as she should've with Peter.]
[But here they are, with a proverbial elephant in the equally proverbial room.
Akame takes a deep breath in the middle of trying to piece together what she was going to say and how she was going to say it, staring at the sky, only to blink a little and look over at Tsuna upon hearing his apology.
She frowns, appearing confused.]
Apologize? What for?
[A tilt of the head.]
Tsuna, you've done nothing wrong.
[At least, not in her eyes.]
no subject
[ apologies meant nothing if she were dead, after all. the same applies to vriska, and he shakes his head at his own words, brows furrowing and eyes downcast. sooner or later, he has to look up, back to akame.
he wants to let her know. he would try terribly hard to stand as a harder wall for those he loved, or he he'd only be a waste. a waste for his friends here and a waste for the fate of his home. ]
That time, when they attacked us at night.
[ the night raid, where he broke down and nearly left akame there to fight alone, run the risk of getting overthrown— ]
I put you in danger. You could have died because—
[ of what he felt, but he seems to be controlling himself before he says anything else. he does give a subtle gesture though, his hand going over his chest, stopping where his heart should be. ]
no subject
It's a familiar sight. This was how Tatsumi looked when Bulat was killed; guilt and sadness stinging him like the pinpricks of many, tiny needles.
This was herself, after she had to kill Martha; after all her friends in the Elite Seven died one by one; after she turned her back on Kurome, leaving her to an unfortunate fate.
She understands how Tsuna feels, but he can't wallow in his mistakes---and, really, he was a kindhearted boy who couldn't bring himself to hurt innocents.
He can't be faulted for that. Akame puts a hand on his shoulder.]
You were conflicted for good reason. That's not so much a fault as it is staying true to yourself. You can do more and be more, Tsuna. But here...you have to be willing to compromise your intentions with the deeds you have to commit here.
[Akame's brow furrows briefly. She understands what he's getting at: he wants to do more, to become stronger, more resolute.
But that will come with a sacrifice, as Kaneki reminded her. She herself had to cast aside whatever inherent righteousness that remained within her to take up the mantle of assassin.]
You have to be willing to do whatever it takes to protect those around you, and back where you're from, even if it goes against what you stand for.